Desires

 If you’re a mother and you never do anything for yourself- you don’t even know what you like to do anymore…

1. You are not alone. 
2. If you can recognise this- you CAN start to change it- here’s one simple way to start

Go buy yourself a notebook. This is you ‘desire’ book. For 5 mins each day, write out anything you desire. Could be tiny like ‘a day to myself’ or big like a holiday. Don’t hold back. Let yourself be selfish. 

A good girl isn’t supposed to want anything - which is why it’s more socially acceptable to complain than to ask. In this exercise, you are hunting for unexpressed desires in any of your relationships. 

Write down as many complaints as you can think of. These complaints can relate to family, friends, colleagues, anyone. 

Each should be a short statement that outlines the complaint without attacking the individuals. 


Next, beside each complaint, write down specifically what you feel would satisfy the complaint as a 1:1 ratio. For example: Complaint: My son doesn’t do his own laundry. Desire: My son does his own laundry. 

But complaints are almost never satisfied by a 1:1 ratio. That is why complaints feel so bad, because the desire in them is squeezed and doesn’t have room. That is what your body registers in discomfort when hearing or making a complaint.